It happened again Friday, Valentine’s Day… the moment I start up my car Beyoncé begins singing this song… and I cry some more. But this cry is becoming a partly  thankful one, thankful and also puzzled about how the universe works. If I listed all the signs I’ve felt and seen since November 2011, people may think I’m losing it… but I cannot resist sharing this one…

Last summer my south-facing window box planted itself for the first time in 20 years… by that I mean that in June when I would have put new annual plants in there I found petunias were already well underway. Of course, I know they ‘self-seeded’… but why now? And why did they grow so beautifully without me watering or fertilizing them till November…

And then, of course, the greatest gift Robert gave me… sweet Hannah… here is some photo evidence that I choose to see as his presence with us in September as we gathered for Craig’s Cause in his honour:

Oh, I could just go on and on with this list of gifts that keep coming from above… and maybe another day I will.

I do know that I am much better now… actually working full time, finally, even though this secretly means I’ve just gotten better at pretending. However, my experience allows me to notice other people putting their best possible face forward in order to survive, too. A wonderful counsellor told me ” it’s easier to behave your way into a new path of thinking, than to think your way into a new path of behaving”, and I so thank her for that.

Robert’s love and his Halo still surround me, and others.. yes, I know I’m still sharing him with his peeps, as always. Many of those people helped out generously with our Gift Card Basket Ticket sales in the Fall, and we were thrilled to raise  $3,436.55 for Robert’s scholarship. Alicia  Jessome won the basket, so thank you to her and to everyone who supported this cause so dear to our hearts.

love,
Eileen