Since January first I have been faithfully doing the daily reading from “The Book of Awakening”, looking for clues, hope, inspiration… scanning for words that might compel me to stand up and be alive in my life. Every now and then I get the sense that a wisp of wisdom has just darted by me, but it is never tangible enough for my mathy head and clay feet. Then, a few days ago, exactly a year-and-a-half after Robert’s leaving… this:
“Look with your sad eyes on things new to you that will give you something to do with your sadness. Your sadness is the paint. You must find a canvas.”
Either this one makes good sense, or I am simply ready for it now. So I am trying it on for size, although not literally, of course. While there’s plenty of sadness, there’s no actual paint. For almost a year I have been anti-depressant-free but am still, in truth, eviscerated by losing Robert. And if he hadn’t hated Coronation Street so much, I’d have said ‘gutted’ there instead.
Nevertheless, one very beautiful canvas that has been under construction for a while is the Sir John A Macdonald award in Robert’s honour. I am proud to say we got this Integrity Award and its criteria so right that I am thrilled!
Please peruse the Robert Sampson Integrity Award itself, and also our Fundraiser to support it. Although it may take a little time to raise all the necessary funds to ensure the award is perpetual, I cannot possibly wait another year to start, and will be awarding it to one awesome, compassionate, SJA graduate very shortly, on June 27th.
I will always remember Robert saying to me, of all things…. “I hope people don’t forget me”… as if that was even possible (!) I replied…..
Any and all support in this endeavour is greatly appreciated.
…and if you are inspired and able to make a tax-deductible donation here’s the link,
thank you everybody!
xo
Eileen